Insomnia

I have suffered from insomnia to some degree since I was in high school. Mostly it is the intermittent form which allows me to get to sleep, but at some point in the night I wake up and can't get back to sleep, and then for a few hours I am wide awake and restless. Eventually I get to a point where I can get back to some level of sleep for a few more hours in the early part of the morning, but it is never as refreshing as a full uninterrupted night of sleep would have been.

Lately, my insomnia has taken an almost regimented tone. I tend to get to sleep about midnight, and then I wake back up at almost exactly 3:00 a.m.. I try to will myself back to sleep, but after living with this for nearly thirty years I know that after twenty minutes in bed if I am not back to sleep I am not going back to sleep. So I get up and go out to the living room and watch old movies, or read. I used to surf the net in the wee hours, but I don't do that anymore because we now have our internet connection in the bedroom and I don't want to disturb my sleeping husband any more than I have to. So I get up and leave the bedroom.

I have to admit I have seen some of the worst dreck ever produced for television. I have also had the luxury of seeing some of the most wonderful old movies in those wee hours. Thank heaven for EWTN, and Classic movie channels is all I can say. I was blessed one week with the entire Spanish television Mini Series of the life of Teresa of Avilla. How amazing was that?

In this regimented stage of insomnia, I seem to get tired enough to get some more sleep at exactly 5:00 a.m.. I have debated whether it would be better for me to sleep out on the couch, so as to not disturb my husband anymore than I have to, or to try to get back into bed, where I can get the best rest in short time I have before I have to get up and start my day. I finally decided that I should get back into bed, hoping that he would understand my dilemma. He at least can get back to sleep pretty easily.

I guess I owe him a big apology for waking him up every morning at 0 dark 30 (that's military time for those of you who don't know). I just know that I sleep much more soundly when I am near him than I would on a couch in another part of the house. I hope I'm worth the annoyance.

Pax